i wanna be a $Baller$

well, i had my warped-wedding-4dayweekend in calgary and survived...barely! I think a 4 day vacay is a little bit too long for me 'cause it is such a shock after it's over when i'm @ work and realize it's 2:30 in the aft and im not drinking somewhere on a patio.

When I did come home, suddenly I was just overwhelmed with responsibilities and real life. I actually had a slight panic attack at work. I realized i have completely forgotten to update my student loans info so im pretty sure im being charged some sort of interest on them...i need to apply for more because i certainly haven’t saved enough cashish to get me through the winter...and i had an email from the U of A telling me i owe a $175 confirmation deposit. if i cant afford the deposit how the hell am i gonna afford a whole f-ing year of school?!?!?!

I go through this phase every summer at about this time where I decide I am taking a year off school….i sit back and reflect on the last 3 months and how happy and relaxed and content I have been….and then I reflect a little further back to the last school year and remember how freaking miserable and gay it was and wonder why I choose to torture myself year after year with a 6 month prison sentence at the of U of A. I am just so tempted to blow off my whole life plan..and then I realize…I still have a whole other degree to go after this one! Is this really how I have chosen to live out my twenties? What am I thinking!?! I wonder if it’s really worth it…how much money am I gonna be rollin’ in when Im older to make all this shit worth it? Really…is it ever worth it if Im this bummed out? And then I get worried that after all this shit what if I’m STILL not happy?! What if it’s not school and Edmonton and winter I hate but I’m actually just not meant to be happy? What if I never achieve my goals? The ones that I think are just out of my reach and I can actualize once I have U of A outta the way….that is the most terrifying thought ever…...there should be some sort of “happiness guarantee” that says if u tough out the brutal parts the sweet-ass parts will for sure come. Really, how do u know if doing the “right thing” is ever worth it?

DJ AM please call me!

“oh what a night…"

Wow, where the hell did July go? what a month we have had! right now i feel like im coming off a 4 day bender....which is not a good thing since i am actually going in to a 4 day bender! so, lets recap some of the high (low?) points of july:

1. My Tattoo! so i finally sucked it up and did it, it is adorable and i love it. it is a handwritten L with sparkles and stars around it...if that's not ghetto fabulous i dont know what is. as soon as i was done i felt such a huge sense of relief...i have always known i was going to get a tattoo eventually and i always had a sinking feeling that i might regret it a little bit...but i dont! the only bummer of it all is the healing process which is really annoying because i cant wear shoes and im getting really sick of my princess jasmine slippers.

2. My unexpected Den/HiFi night: so, i had the day off last thursday and since i cant go hiking yet i thought i'd hit up market mall in calgary to buy myself things i didnt really need. i ended up meeting jd there to help him pick out a pimped out tux...which is a lucky thing because snoop da coup (my car) decided he wasnt up for driving me home that day so we (obviously) decided my only other option of what to do for the day was sit on the den patio and drink margaritas for 5 hours. hehe. thats where the night started...the yardhouse and hifi followed....3 hours of sleep later i was driving home to work the next morning trying to figure out which of my body parts was aching the most.

3. DJ AM!!!!!!!!!! good god, what a night! (hence the above song) the entire fishbowl trailer rallied in calgary for the last day of stampede. us 3 girls coming together kind of created a "triple eclipse" effect of debauchery. we went to tantra which did not disapoint me in my high expectations of being super sleazed out. we had the pleasure of Nate and Rye-Guy accompanying us as well as I was pleased to find out that we were in the good graces of one of the bartenders "King"...who jes insisted on calling "King Kong" all night. Now, as im sure u all know, DJ AM is Nicole Richies ex-fiance. and to be honest that was the only reason i spent an unexplainable $30 @ ticketmaster to go see the guy. but before u hold it against him i have to say....best show ever!! that guy can seriously spin..and he looks alot less like a douchebag without a starving nicole richie standing next to him. the dancing was uncontrollable. (and in Jes's case so was the biting) after i finally accepted there was no way i was ever going to get backstage and make my DJ AM fantasies a reality we went back to rye-guy's and continued the fun-fest (but with our inside voices so we wouldnt wake corey) i think the excitement of DJ AM must have gotten in my blood because everyone had long passed out before i had even begun to unwind. there was definately no sleep in the champagne room for me...work the next morning literally felt like my brain was pouring out of my ears!! But totally, totally worth it.

4. and to end things on a more wholesome note, we celebrated Jenny’s bday by ordering Chinese and surprising her wit icecream cake…awww what nice people we are! Alright, that’s about all, I leave work today two hours early to rock back into c-town for four more days of shopping, warped, (whoop whoop) and a wedding! –linz-

Drunken Psychology

Canada Day, Why hast thou forsaken me?
Well, last night was the first time i was actually in Canada for Canada day in 3 years. But don't worry, i definately made up for the last 2 years absense! I decided I had better record the events of the night right away while the memories are still fresh.....and by fresh i mean blurry. Over the course of the night i learned 3 key life lessons: which is one of the things i love about being 21 actually, i have so much to learn...a zest for life really. everyday is a learning adventure. Alright, go on with the lessons....

1. Jes and I cannot, in any shape way or form, drink in moderation when together. ever.

2. It is never a good idea to allow one sober person [thresher] to partake in the festivities when Jes & I are that Rowdacious because then we have to suffer the multiple stories and impressions the next day at work.....i think that perhaps there is a psychological aspect to blacking out....it could be proposed that freud (and by freud i mean Newman) might agree that our Ego's purposely repress the drunken memories of things we may have done while we were smammered and our Id's were in complete control. big shout out to the Id.

Thirdly and perhaps most importantly,

3. McDonalds drive-thru has a "late night" menu that they try to use to trick you into thinking that not all the food on the regular menu is available during the night....as if apple pie has a curfew and isn't allowed out past 10pm or sumthin' ridiculous like that. like, after 11 oclock on the "bad side" of the deep fryer all the cheese burgers gang up and mug the unsuspecting yogurt parfaits. wowzers, got a little off topic there...... back to lesson #3:
BUT if you were to ask for a fajita even if they dont technically have a fajita on the late night menu they could still make you a fajita because they understand that drunk people in the late night drive-thru are operating completely on cravings & urges (once again with the Id) and sometimes you are craving a fajita and a McChicken just isn't going to do it for you. A fajita is the one and only thing that is going to satisfy u. Unfortunately the sober person driving you sometimes doesnt quite understand your need for a fajita and no amount of fajita chanting will change his mind. So u dont get a fajita. U get a McChicken.

Well, those are my life lessons of last night. u might want to refer back to this page if you are ever feeling lost or lacking inspiration. they'll get u right back on track.

so yes, Canada Day was grand. Quick timeline:
Drake- drinks
Random Guy's House- drinks and fireworks...where tiff proceeded to ditch and leave us with her friends who we did not at all know.....so Jes just discussed her oral fixation to break the ice (what would we do without good ol' Sigmund?!)
Rose & Crown- drink, drank, drunk. Jes & Thresher ate flowers. Jes broke a glass. Jes and I gave each other temporary tattoos via licking....think about it...there may have been a resulting hickey.
Drake- (again) more drunken drinking with some added drunken dancing and drunken debauchery. I impressed myself with not spending my usual $100...i think i have finally figured out that usually guy bartenders will buy girls drinks and not the other way around!? what a concept.

and then trailor, mcd's, trailor....and passed right out. Whoop Whoop I Sure Do Love My Country! -Linny-

future blogs to come....my tattoo im getting on wednesday. im crazy excited but am worried its going to F-ing hurt because its on the top of my foot...any tips?